Ok. So I'm standing and waiting to meet CPK Guy for an impromptu meet-up in Manhattan (he lives in BK). Its such a long story as to why I'd been avoiding him in the first place, but I figured an afternoon mtg. in public couldn't hurt. Maybe I was wrong. Anyway, this is a good looking guy. He's tall, football player body (but not a thick neck body-a nice muscular one), gorgeous eyes, straight white teeth, and a great smile, you know cute. And he's a professional (educator) so he should be up my alley! Anyway, I'm waiting for him and I'm dreading the visit at the same time. What is wrong with me? Why do I torture myself? Every time I'm around this man he seems to find a way to make me feel like a sirloin steak on the plate of a man who just came off a 30-day fast!! I mean, damn! He keeps affirming to me that I have this ultra violet "WHORE" tattooed on my forehead!! It's so annoying.

I'm sure most women would agree that the first time you meet a man and he truly looks at you, it becomes apparent which category you'd like to put him in (there's a variety of 'em). It is also apparent to most women (whether they want to acknowledge it or not) that the first time a man touches you (in whatever capacity/even an accidental brush past you) it is evident what that man's intentions are towards you.

Some men touch you like they expect to find serenity within you, and they want to protect you and that (shut up! I know I'm a horrible feminist), and like the connection of your skin to his feels natural to both of you. You could swear your body just heated up at least 10 degrees from his touch. There are also those men who's touch is intentionally forgettable, just flesh to flesh, minus the head and heart that always feels strained and awkward, because he fears the opportunity to connect. And then there are those men who, the first time they touch you, even if just to take a hand (let alone a hug or anything else), touch you like their intention is to disrupt your happiness, under the guise of packs of lies they intend to tell.

CPK Guy has greeted me with a hug (and tug of my hand) each time we've met. So I've already figured him out. The question is, how long do I continue on with this?

See the thing about women is that, some times we let some men touch us, because we fear, that other men have touched us right!

Until.